An Ode to AAA in Eleven Parts

Photo by Heorhii Heorhiichuk on Pexels.com

I

Someone didn’t secure their load
Partially dissected garbage bag
Glass and metal everywhere
Sharp and pointy

I swerve
I’m lucky
No car in the other lane

A blizzard of carelessness
A cloud of swirling shards and paper strips
Objects tossed around by the whirlwind
Hitting other vehicles

II

Exits 25A–27 1 mile
I move to the right lane
To access the ramp

Ping!

The car’s computer tells me
There’s a problem with the tire pressure

Shit shit shit shit

I exit
U-turn
Park

Kick kick kick kick
Press down with the thumb
Tires seem fine

III

We have history
The tire pressure alarm and I

Last time the alarm went off
One of the tires went flat

Like a pancake

I have 55 miles to drive back home
Should I take a chance?

IV

AAA issues a dispatch
2.34 pm
Tow truck ETA 35 minutes

After an hour
I get a text
AAA won’t deduct the miles on my membership
They didn’t live up to their promise

New ETA 90 minutes

V

I buy two chicken empañadas
And a bottle of water

I take out cash
For the driver
When he comes

VI

A driver calls
You have a problem with the tires?
We need to send you a different truck.

New ETA: 90 minutes

VII

I buy a half grilled chicken with yellow rice and veggies
I finish my water bottle

New ETA: 60 minutes

VIII

A driver calls.
Can you drive the car or is it stuck?
I can drive it.
Can you drive it out of the garage?
Yes.

IX

The driver calls.
I’m ten minutes away. You can move the car now.
Are you on the west side of the garage?
Yes.

X

The best music was in the seventies.
The best concert I ever saw was
Kiss
Rochester, NY
1975.

Wow! That’s hardcore.

I really like Aerosmith too.

I saw Kiss
and Aerosmith
at Madison Square Garden.

Now that would have been a concert!

Yeah, it was great.

XI

All I paid for the fifty-five mile tow
Was the bill
I handed the driver
At 8.30 pm

Thanks to
AAA

In the words of my friend, the Australian, I shall return.

__________________________________________________________

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